Best Environmental Disaster?

Lowbrow Answer: Oil Spill
Yeah, I get it. Oil spills fuck up our environment. Boo hoo. I'm sorry, but I'm not impressed by something whose worst casualties are endangered pelicans. I like baby seals and clown fish as much as the next guy, but come on. Where are the thousands of dead bodies? Where are the hundreds of flattened houses? Oil spills are the boring Jane Austen novels in the literature of environmental disasters.

Why are we still drilling for oil anyway? We have wireless internet and touch-screen computers and those little plastic things that help you peel oranges; can't we invent some better way to make energy? Maybe we could create some sort of circular device that could harness the power of the air. Like a mill, but for wind. Like, a "wind-mill." I dunno, maybe I'm just talking crazy.


Middlebrow Answer: Mercury Leak
So imagine you're building a big industrial factory and it's time to install the toxic waste drainage. And the two options are to either (A) pipe the toxic waste to a off-site facility or (B) dump it straight into the ocean. Which do you pick?

If you chose A, you're intelligent! Pat yourself on the back.
If you chose B, you're Japan! Stab yourself with a samurai sword.

From 1932 to 1968, the Chisso Corporation of Minimata, Japan, dumped lethal mercury into the town's harbor. As a result, thousands of people suffered mercury poisoning, which fucks with your neurological function and eventually kills you. Nice work, Japan. I guess I shouldn't be surprised - this is the country where you can buy used panties from vending machines and whose two biggest exports are dolphin-slaughtering and Hello Kitty.


Highbrow Answer: Gas Explosion
You can't see it or hear it, and by the time you smell it, your skin is melting off and you're spitting up your gall bladder. Fun, huh? The worst gas explosion in history was the Bhopal Catastrophe of 1984, when 40 tons of methyl isocyanate (aka, cyanide) leaked out of the Union Carbide plant and wafted into the city. It killed 4,000 people instantly and injured another 500,000. Gives new meaning to the term, "silent but deadly" eh?

What makes Bhopal truly highbrow is the fact that it happened in one of the poorest parts of India. Nothing like inflicting more damage on people who are already living well below the poverty line. It's like punching a Dalmatian at a rescue shelter. Heartless. But highbrow cares not for your trivial human emotions or your adorable spotted dogs.