Best Version of John Cusack?

Lowbrow Answer: Action Movie Cusack
I love you, John, but what are you doing in "2012"? I can just picture the audition process.

Roland Emmerich: "John, how fast can you run away from exploding stuff?"
John: "I ran the 400m in high school..."
Roland Emmerich: "Perfect. You're hired."

I'm sorry to be the one to break this to you, but you aren't Bruce Willis. Forget the action stunts and flaming cars and stick to what you know: running your hand through your weird hair while you blabber about the melancholy of love.


Middlebrow Answer: Dramedy Cusack
This is classic Cusack. You can't really argue with "High Fidelity" or "Say Anything." He's the hero for all of us indie kids who like to decry love and affection on the outside, but who are dying for a hug on the inside. You also have to give Cusack credit for sounding as witty in these movies as we all think that we are in real life.

Although, he's kind of a pussy. Dude. The blonde chick in "High Fidelity" is ugly. Move on. And "In Your Eyes"? Really? You get to blast one song on your radio to win back your love and you chose Peter Gabriel? Could you be any more cliche? You're the kind of guy who has the string quartet play "Fields of Gold" at his wedding. Lame.


Highbrow Answer: High-Concept Cusack
Remember when you first saw "Being John Malcovich" and your head exploded from all the awesomenitude? And you wondered why every movie couldn't be that good? And why Cusack wasn't the biggest star in the universe? But then you realized that most of America's population is comprised of drooling idiots who think that Rowe vs. Wade was a boxing match in the 1980's. Ah well. Sorry, John.

Cusack is at his best when his natural weirdness actually enhances the theme of the story. They could have had a whole scene of him just taking a dump in "Being John Malcovich" and I would have told all my friends about how mystical a moment it was for the plot. I love you, High-Concept Cusack. Stay strange, my friend, stay strange. Oh, and avoid "Serendipity 2" if it ever comes your way.